Show Intro
I am Elijah R Young, I’m here with Sarah J. Storer and this is Relations: The Podcast, the on-demand radio show giving you better relationships, and more importantly, helping you become a better person to be in a relationship with…In today’s show:
Show Description
We’ll look at an inflammatory post about why women (who would like to date) are still single.
http://www.nairaland.com/1321130/honest-reasons-why-some-women
By the end of this episode:
- [Show subtopics]
Describe the problem
…Women are high maintenance hags who sabotage their own happiness.
Segment #1
- 1. Cause You Act Like A B**CH!!! – Yeah I said it, and what! Now I’m not trying to use that term in a general and disrespectful way. I am using it in a very specific and factual way. You have so many women that walk around with this nasty, stuck up attitude and they have the nerve to wonder why they struggle with finding the right man. Some of them have the audacity to cover it up by proclaiming to be a “diva”, too “classy”, or that they are just speaking their mind. In reality you just act like a b**ch.
- 2. You Blame Men For Everything – That is why your Bottom is still single. You refuse to make yourself accountable for your actions. Everything is a man’s fault, and according to you, once they “act right” then you will have no problem falling in line. First off, I agree that men have contributed so much to the issues in relationships and women in general. We as men do have a responsibility to step up and do better. The thing is, if you aren’t willing to “step up” as well, then we will continue to have an issue, and you will continue to find yourself by yourself.
- 3. You Think Your Looks Will Carry You Through Life – Ok so you’re beautiful and have a nice body, great! Problem is, if a man talks to you and finds out that there is nothing else to you then why would he bother wanting to make you his woman. He will still want séx (séx is always an option for men) but that’s it. Men may be more superficial than women, but most of us still want a woman who has some kind of personality. Make yourself a more well-rounded fun individual and more men will want to make you their own.
- 4. You Are A Gold Digger – ok maybe you aren’t exactly on that level, but you have made how much he makes your top priority. You are so caught up in dollar signs that you overlook the things that are truly important to having and maintaining a relationship. Realize that most men are not rich, so right there you immediately make it harder for yourself to find the right guy. Even if a guy has money, if he sees that’s what you are mainly about he won’t take you seriously. I’m not saying date broke men, but I am saying that money should not be your main motivator. Have better priorities and you will find yourself in better relationships.
- 5. You Don’t Keep Yourself Up – not that you have to get your nails and hair done every 2 weeks (though some of us do like that) but you can’t always look raggedy either. I mean damn, some of you ladies just put no real effort into how you look. Not everyone has the same style, but good hygiene and health should be a goal for all. Most of us want our woman to look good
[message break]
Segment #2
- Your Séx Is Weak! – I personally believe it is best to wait but the reality is that most of us have or will engage in séx before we are married. As a woman if you chose to do that, then understand that your “skills” or lack thereof will impact a man’s willingness to make you his woman. Unfortunately a lot of women think they are good but really the experience was nothing to talk about. Women are quick to talk about a man’s performance while neglecting the fact that they could use a lot of improvement as well.
- You’ve been Hurt – many single women reading this remain single or in dead-end relationships because you have been hurt in your past. This hurt can be from a previous relationship, previous situation with a man, or séxual abuse. Some of the first six reasons I listed are just manifestations of that same hurt you are holding on to. You now operate with walls up to protect you, but it is those same walls that continue to block the blessings you deserve to receive.
- You keep entertaining the “wrong guy” – you know he isn’t the one for you yet you continue to entertain this man and his nonsense. He isn’t even giving you a full commitment but yet you are giving him all the benefits of a real relationship. How do you expect to ever find the “right guy” when you ALLOW yourself to continuously deal with the “wrong guy”? You want a relationship, but you let this (single or taken) man continue to take from you without having to fully give you what you desire in return.
- You’re too busy enjoying the “Single Life” – you’re just having too much fun living it up. Maybe you like to come and go as you please. Maybe you enjoy the free meals, outings, and for some, the bills that get paid from your “guy friends”. If those are your reasons, I get it, but just make sure that you aren’t using that as a front. Many women claim to love the “single life” but in a heartbeat they would trade it in for a genuine relationship.
- You lack “positive energy”– this is different from #1 on the list “acting like a b**ch”. Some of you may not be negative or mean, but you still don’t give off any positive energy. If you were a light bulb, you would be a flickering light at best. Some of this is due to lack of self-esteem, unresolved issues that have sapped your strength, or just taking on too much to the point where you are beat down and worn out. Whatever the reason is, that inability to “shine bright” makes it hard for a man to be drawn to you.
[message break]
Final Thoughts:
- You haven’t met “that guy” – shout out to the ladies that don’t settle. Shout out to the ladies that understand that if he isn’t the right guy for you, then forcing a relationship is pointless. I applaud you and I hope more women would take that path. The reality is, just because you meet a “good guy” that doesn’t mean he is the “right guy”. Continue to be patient, but make sure that the reason you haven’t met him isn’t due to unfair requirements you have set. If “that guy” is defined by his job, car, income bracket, and things of that nature then good luck with that. Those things make finding him harder, and personally I think you should focus on finding a man you connect with. Without that connection, “that guy” will easily become “that ex” in due time.
- Elijah’s Thoughts
- Sarah’s Thoughts
Show recap
Listener Mail
Show Close
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Until we meet again, keep striving to make every relationship you have the best it can possibly be, including (and especially) the one with yourself. We’ll talk soon.
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